Monday, February 13, 2012

Going back in time...

I was browsing my files and came across all my project photos in Picasa. I'm so glad I backed everything up online. What happened, though, was another reminder of why I love scrapbooking the way I do. I come across layouts like this...


This was one of my first layouts as an SFTIO design team member back in July 2010. Our emotion was Courage. When I read my journaling on this layout, I giggled slightly. You see, for the past week or two I've been in a funk. The best picture I can give you is it was as if I was sliding down a hill. There were things to grab onto. I could have fought. But I eventually gave up and just sank. I think I gave up because I couldn't figure out why. And I clammed up about it.... at first. Up until this past weekend, it took every ounce of energy to smile. Deep inside I wanted to cry. I had no creative motivation or desire to do anything. As fellow creative types, you might be able to relate to the frustration I had felt by NEEDING to create but just couldn't. So, so frustrating when that is your therapy.

Then, I thought, why the heck am I being silent about how I'm feeling? Hello!?!? I have friends who would probably be there to encourage me immediately. And what would happen if I forced myself to create? That's exactly what I did Sunday night. I made myself create and I was pretty clear about how I was feeling.

So back to the giggling at this layout... I giggled because in my journaling I professed to being so brave and outspoken about things. And here I was - baffled by why I was feeling so down in the dumps and it was because I wasn't being me. *sigh* I am slightly thankful for times like this that make us realize more about us and cause us to become even more aware and stronger.

Yes. I am brave. But I'm also human and a female and ... well... there you go!

By the way... I'm on my way back up the hill. Creating last night helped so much! And I'm not asking for any sympathy or encouragement or advice. But hoping someone can relate and give a huge sigh along with me. Because I feel ya sister!

What is your "therapy"? It would be easy to assume scrapbooking since that is probably what drew you to my blog but I know so many of us are drawn to different hobbies and activities.

~ Melissa

1 comment:

Rita Barakat said...

Great post girlie - been in a funk since CHA myself. Too much to do and not enough me to go around! Sat down to create last night and have been creating today too - who cares about stinking laundry! LOL!